Symbols: ww: wrong word. g:
grammar. p: punctuation. :
remove word. s: spelling. f-ww.:
(in)formal word. wo: word order. :
add a word. wf: word form. *: possibly ok.
Ver también: Linkers
para una lista de palabras que te pueden ayudar en tus escritos.
Hi, I'm Guillermo and I am going to write about what the
situation in the Canary Islands is like after the forest fires
which occurred last summer.
In the former situation, before the catastrophe, there were
Canary pine forests scattered all over the islands' surface.
In general terms, the main functions of forests are as follows:
- To control the runoff speed over the soil's surface and
to protect the soil before the raindrops release their energy.
- The plants' roots hold the topsoil and create a suitable
recipient for the storage of nutrients.
As you can imagine, the situation is completely different
after the forest fire. Now, the ecosystems are very vulnerable
and in great danger. If we don't do anything, the rain will
wash away the topsoil and the runoff will get out of control.
From the point of view of "biodiversity," there
are some singularities in the Canary Islands. Let me explain
some of them:
The Canary mountain ranges run East to West across the islands
and because of this, they offer a barrier against the movement
of air Southwards. The Alysian winds, coming from the North
and full of moisture, release all their water before crossing
the mountain ranges. That's why we find a tropical rainforest
in some big areas of the Canary Islands.
As you can see, there are a lot of interesting ecosystems
to protect before the rain comes. We will do our best because
there's a lot at stake.
Guillermo
Explanations:
"I
am going to write about how
the situation in
Canary Island is like
after the forest fires
occurred the
last summer." vs. "I am going to write about what
the situation in the Canary Islands
is like after
the forest fires which
occurred last summer." - There are a couple of errors
here: 1) The correct structure to use is "what
is the situation like?"
(The error probably comes from a direct translation of "como"
in Spanish.) 2) Use the article "the" with the word
"islands." I.e. "the Hawaiian
Islands," etc. 3) Grammatically speaking, the problem
here is a "disagreement" of tenses. If you prefer,
you can write about "what the situation in the Canary
Islands was like after the forest fires occurred
last summer." 4) Use the plural "Canary Islands."
It's not just one island. 5) If you're talking about the week
which happened before this one, you don't use the article
"the." (I.e. Last week, I went to a wedding.) If
you're talking about the last week in a series of weeks during
your month-long vacation, for example, you use the article
"the." (I.e. The last week of my vacation, I was
invited to a big party.)
"In
former situation,
before the catastrophe, there were canary
pine forests scattered all over the island
surface." vs. "In the former situation before the
catastrophe, there were Canary
pine forests scattered all over the islands'
surface." - There are a couple of errors here: 1) The
proper connecting expression here is "in the former situation."
2) Though not an error, the comma after the word "situation"
is unnecessary. 3) The word "Canary" is capitalized
in "Canary pine forests" as is the word "Georgia"
is capitalized in "Georgia pine forests." 4) It's
best to use the genitive in to refer to the surface of the
islands.
"the
main functions of forests are as follow:"
vs. "the main functions of forests are as follows:"
-
Treat the phrase "as follows" as an expression which
you cannot change.
"
Control of runoff speed
over the soil surface
and protect the soil before the raindrops energy." vs.
"To control the runoff's
speed over the soil's
surface and to protect the soil before the raindrops release
their energy." - There are several mistakes
here: 1) The first one is perhaps organizational. When you
use a "short-note" style in a list of points (i.e.
a list without prepositions, etc.), you risk losing clarity.
Think of each point as a separate continuation of the phrase
"the main functions of forests are to
control . . . , and to hold the topsoil."
2) "Runoff" means "rainfall not absorbed by
soil." 3) It's best to either talk of "the surface
of the soil" or use the genitive in "the soil's
surface." 4) I simply guessed what you meant to say in
the last part of this sentence. Note: As
it turns out, what Guillermo meant to write was: "to
protect the soil from the raindrops' energy." This was
a Spanglish error: "ante la energía
de la lluvia."
"Plant's
roots hold the topsoil and create a suitable recipient for
nutrients storage."
vs. "The plants' roots hold the topsoil and create a
suitable recipient for the storage
of nutrients." - There are a couple of
points here: 1) I suppose there is more than just one plant.
The use of the apostrophe between the "t" and the
"s" indicates there's only one plant. Using the
apostrophe after the "s" indicates there is more
than just one plant. 2) You could either say "the nutrients'
storage" (with the genitive) or "the storage of
nutrients."
"As
you can imagine, after the forest fire the situation is completely
different." vs. "As you can imagine, the situation
is completely different after the forest fire." - The
difference between the two sentences is primarily one of style.
It's usually best to place a comma after an introductory phrase
like "after something." In your sentence, however,
you already have an linking phrase ("as you can imagine"),
and so I think it's best to place the other one at the end
of the sentence.
"Now the ecosystems are very vulnerable and in great
danger." vs. "Now, the ecosystems are very vulnerable
and in great danger." - As in the previous sentence,
it's best to place a comma after a sequential linker at the
beginning of a sentence.
"If
we don't do anything,
rain will wash away the topsoil
and the runoff will be
out of control." vs. "If we don't do anything, the
rain will wash away the topsoil
and the runoff
will get out
of control." - There are a few points here: 1) The article
"the" in "the rain will . . . " is optional,
but it more clearly defines which "rain" is going
to wash away the topsoil. 2) The correct word referring to
the upper part of the soil is "topsoil." 3) See
"runoff" in an earlier explanation. 4) The verb
"be" in "be out of control" is rather
static and seems to indicate that the situation is "currently"
this way. The verb "get" in "get out of control"
is more dynamic and indicates that the situation is currently
not out of control.
"From
biodiversity point of view there are . . ." vs. "From
the point of view of 'biodiversity,' there are . . ."
- The second structure is clearer and more frequent. (The
first one is incorrect.)
"The
Canary mountain ranges go
across from East to West and because of
this they offer a barrier against air
masses movement Southwards." vs.
"The Canary mountain ranges run
East to West across the islands and because of this,
they offer a barrier against the
movement of air masses Southwards." There
are a few points here: 1) As you used the words "mountain
ranges," the reader assumes there is more than one mountain
range in the Canary Islands. 2) Mountains don't usually "go
across" from East to West. They usually "run East
to West," without the preposition "from." 3)
Place a comma after the phrase "because of this"
before a sentence with a subject and verb. 4) The verb "offer"
in the phrase "to offer a barrier"
doesn't seem to be the best one to me, but I can't say it's
a mistake. 5) It's best to write about "the movement
of air masses" instead of "hopelessly" trying
to use a genitive here. In any case, you over-use the genitive.
Try to use the genitive mainly just for people. We can say:
"Steve's leg" and "the leg of the table,"
but not: "the table's leg."
"As
you can see, there are a lot of interesting ecosystems to
protect before rain
comes." vs. "As you can see, there are a lot of
interesting ecosystems to protect before the
rain comes." - Again, as in a previous example, we're
talking about "the" rain in the
Canary Islands, especially that which we're dreading (expecting
in a negative way) the arrival of.
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