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Global Warming

Writing: Correction of texts.

Symbols:
ww: wrong word. g: grammar.
p: punctuation. : remove word.
s: spelling. f-ww.: (in)formal word.
wo: word order. : add a word.
wf: word form. *: possibly ok.

Ver también: Linkers para una lista de palabras que te pueden ayudar en tus escritos.

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Escribe un texto para que te lo corriga

Ver también: Linkers para una lista de palabras que te pueden ayudar en tus escritos.

Write about global warming. Give your opinion about what should be done.

Text: If you like, try to correct the text first. I've given you a few hints. See the key above.





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Corrected text:

Global Warming

The fact that there is global warming can’t be denied. Even though some governments try to misinform us about it by saying that there is no such problem, it doesn't take a rocket scientist to realize that temperatures are rising.

There is also a new theory that states that the main cause of global warming is not the CO2 accumulated in the atmosphere, but the water vapor. It would be this gas then and not the CO2 which was responsible for higher temperatures.

The Earth reflects part of the energy that comes from the sun and these gases bounce part of this heat back to the Earth’s surface, creating the greenhouse effect.

It was handy to say that what was responsible for the greenhouse effect was the CO2 when the main industries of competing countries were producing it, in order to go against them. Maybe now, for some other self-interested reasons, it is handy to say that the water vapor is responsible.

Who knows what the truth is? The man in the street doesn´t have the tools to investigate it by himself. All we know is what we can see: the temperatures are rising.

Why? Or is anybody going to do anything about it? We don´t know.

Victoria G.

Explanations:

The Global Warming - To speak about a specific item that we both know about, you can use words like "this," "that" and "the" to define which object or subject you are talking about. For example, if you have a bowl of soup with carrots in front of you and you say "I like the carrots," I know from the context that you are speaking about the carrots in front of you. The word "these" as in the sentence "I like these carrots" doesn't change the meaning much. However, if I say "I like carrots," I am talking about carrots in general. If you say "The Global Warming," it is confusing because it sounds like you're talking about a specific and limited case which we both know about.

"that there is not such problem" - "that there is no such problem" or, if you prefer, "that there is not such a problem."

"anybody can realize that temperatures are rising" - This is an awkward (clumsy) Spanglishy way of saying something like "it doesn't take a rocket scientist to realize that temperatures are rising." Something simpler would be "anybody can see."

"There is also a new theory that states that the cause for global warming..." - "There is also a new theory that states that the main cause for global warming..." "the cause" implies there is only one cause, while you say elsewhere that there are more causes.

"It would be this gas then and not CO2 the main responsible for higher temperatures." - "It would be this gas then and not the CO2 which was responsible for higher temperatures." "The main responsible" is Spanglish because "responsible" can be a noun referring to the person in charge in Spanish, while in English it's an adjective. Also, I use the past of the verb "to be" here ("was responsible") because it sounds as if you're using the second conditional in this sentence implying something like "If you believe this theory, it would be this gas ..."
This error is repeated twice later in the text: "the responsible for the greenhouse effect" and "it is the water vapor the responsible."

"The Earth irradiates part of the energy that comes from the sun..." - "The Earth reflects part of the energy..." "Irradiate" is not the most appropriate synonym for "reflect" in this context. To "irradiate" sounds like the Earth is sending out its own rays and light. Possibly, you don't want to repeat "reflect" twice in the same text (you use it again later in the text). You can solve this by using other words like "bounce" and "trap."

"It came handy to say that..." - "It was handy to say that..." Perhaps, this is another Spanglish error because in Spanish you say "vino a mano."

"competitive countries" - "competing countries" A competitive country isn't necessarily competing with my country. It may be competitive in other areas, but a competing country is clearly competing with mine.

"...were producing it and in this way going against them." - "...were producing it, in order to go against them." In this case, I think you want to use the second "connecting phrase" or "Linker" to describe "purpose" rather than "summarizing" what went before. In other words, in your text you seem to be saying that first world governments may be actively conspiring (the purpose) through the use of a very extensive propaganda campaign to sabatoge third world countries' efforts to industrialize and compete with the first world.

"Maybe now, for some other interested reasons,..." - "Maybe now, for some other self-interested reasons,..." "Reasons" combines with "self-interested" and not "interested" in this context. "Self-interested" means that I am only interested in myself. "Interested" combines well in other phrases like "interested parties."

"How knows what the truth is?" - "Who knows what the truth is?" This is a silly mistake at your level.

"The man in the street doesn't count with the tools to investigate it by himself." - "The man in the street doesn't have the tools to investigate it by himself." This is a Spanglish error as "contar con" translates directly to "count with" and means "have."

"All we know it is what we can see..." - "All we know is what we can see..." There are two subjects in the first sentence: 1) "All we know" and "it." As it is repetitive and redundant, eliminate one: "it."

" temperatures are rising." - "the temperatures are rising." Now, DO use the article "the" to define and limit the temperatures to only those that have to do with "Global Warming" and not to the temperature of your oven, for instance.

Of course, you're free to write whatever you like. However, the instructions stated: "Give your opinion about what should be done." You didn't give your opinion: "...the temperatures are rising. Why? Or is anybody going to do anything about it? We don´t know." Examiners on a First Certificate exam would possibly fail your written text, which is probably a good idea in order to limit students memorizing texts to write on the exam.

Related Activities

Global Warming Speaking



   
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